How you perceive what's going on around you produces an automatic reaction which affects how we feel, which then affects how we think, and therefore what we do. The key to remember is that our perception is "subjective" not "objective". Use these 3 lenses to explore that subjectivity: 

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​System (role): This is about what you consciously or unconsciously believe is expected in your role, and how you're expected to see things. Roles may be organisational (eg top, middle, bottom) or natural (eg innovator, shaper, moderator) or adopted / projected (eg victim, rescuer, tough guy). It can make a big difference when you make deliberate choices about your behavioural role.

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​Personality (you): This is about your (conscious or unconscious) beliefs, and habitual attitudes or assumptions. These manifest differently depending on your current emotional state - so it helps to learn to recognise and understand your different emotional states. 

Interaction (others): This is about the impact of another's personality or role on you, or yours on them, which can change your (or their) emotional state and trigger false assumptions. It can help to intentionally change your emotional reaction to them (or theirs to you).